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Nerds Without Pants   

Nerds Without Pants Episode 233: Big Talk About Little Games


Howdy, folks! No time for a belabored intro this week. It’s another episode of Nerds Without Pants that cannot hope to compete with the previous episode of Nerds Without Pants. Enjoy!

00:00 – 20:51 Sports?

21:02 – 1:33:40 STAGE SELECT: Our favorite mini games

1:33:51 – 3:07:09 CONSUMPTION JUNCTION: The making of NWP radio, Horizon: Forbidden West, Elden Ring

3:07:44 – 3:19:06 VIDEO GAME CAGE MATCH: Dr. Mario vs Dr. Robotnik’s Mean Bean Machine

3:19:14 – 3:25:03 Outro


STAGE SELECT: What are your LEAST favorite levels/areas in games?

VIDEO GAME CAGE MATCH: Grand Theft Auto V vs Red Dead Redemption 2





09/28/2022 at 07:32 PM

Stage Select:

1. The Water Temple in Ocarina of Time. It's not the objectively worst level in gaming. I could dig up some real bullshit levels from obscure games dating from the dawn of home video games. It's more that it was a weak part of what was otherwise arguably the single most amazing game of the entire generation. Ocarina of Time didn't have great swimming mechanics, which would have been fine except that this level threw the game's issues with swimming into glaring relief, and Nintendo did a great job with swimming two years earlier with Super Mario 64. Having to switch between the Iron Boots and the regular boots was tedious. Having to repeat the level's mechanics because you missed something was tedious. Putting both of these issues together... ugh.

2. Riovanes Castle at the end of Final Fantasy Tactics Chapter 3, where you had a one-on-one boss battle locked behind a point-of-no-return save. If you weren't prepared properly and also didn't have a backup save on the world map before you started this sequence of battles, you were screwed. As in, you would have to start the game over from the very beginning screwed. The third battle in this chain of battles is no better. You have to protect a AI-controlled girl from being killed by two demon girls with lethal attacks. Unless you positioned your party in a certain way, it was very possible that your protectee would run right towards the demon girls and get herself killed before your first playable character even had a chance to act, thereby getting a game over through no fault of your own. The Angry Video Game Nerd should do an episode on FF Tactics.  As with Ocarina of Time, FFT is a great game with one section where they made groin-grabbingly baffling design choices.

3. Any racing or stealth section in GTA games, especially since the fail state for those is a complete failure of a long mission. It's not that I object to stealth or racing, per se, but GTA's engine isn't really built around either one. The cars all handle like old shopping carts, and stealth generally doesn't work great in games that around built around it as heavily as Metal Gear or Splinter Cell.


Cage Match: 

I'm not a fan of either of these things. I'm just going with GTA V because it's frankly amazing that Rockstar has pretty much coasted on this one game for almost ten years, in part by turning it into an online casino. Except that a real casino is actually required by law to pay out cash every once in awhile. Who can blame them? It still sells more copies every year than most entire franchises and most publishers do.  And I used to get the appeal of these games. GTA IV bored me to death and kind of put me off of the series, though. Also not interested in the Florida retread that the next game is going for. I've always thought that if Rockstar wanted to be truly gutsy, they'd set GTA in Texas and let their imaginations run wild with what Texas gives them to work with parody-wise.

But hey, RDR 2 has horses so realistic, they randomly take dumps, and you can see their scrotums swelling and contracting. That's why you're paying $1600 for a shiny new RTX4090, after all. 

Cary Woodham

09/29/2022 at 10:26 AM

Stage Select:

I don't like ice levels in games or any level that affects your controls to make things harder.  I don't mind water levels as much as others, though.

I also don't like stealth levels where they don't give you the option to fight your way out if you get caught.  That's the reason why I stopped playing Beyond Good & Evil.

Cage Match

Red Dead Redemption 2 wins because it's got cowboys and horses.  Yee haw!  Plus I really liked that cowboy RPG part of Live A Live.


10/07/2022 at 03:44 AM

STAGE SELECT: Sorry all, technical problems this week (just fixed my laptop, boy, what a couple of months!) so I didn't even see this until right now, but on the topic I did want to recommend a YouTube video by "Displaced Gamers" called "The Broken Water Level of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (NES) - Behind the Code".  This isn't just a normal critique video, the person actually breaks down the code and even uses LUA programming to display the hitboxes on the screen so there's a nice visual.  They even create new code to try and fix the problems with it, most which would fit in a regular NES Game Genie's limitations.  Suffice it to say, the issue with that part goes way beyond what you can normally observe.  Again, that's "The Broken Water Level of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (NES) - Behind the Code" by "Displaced Gamers".  Highly recommend!

VIDEO GAME CAGE MATCH: Horses so realistic they keel over at the slightest breeze, just like the genuine articles.  Grand Theft Auto V wins by default.

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