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Nerds Without Pants   

Nerds Without Pants Episode 267: Critical Miss!

The Elder Stars: New Vegas

Welcome back! On this episode of Nerds Without Pants we are joined by Xavier Kreiger and we talk about SO MUCH BALDUR’S GATE. Also, game characters we love to hate, and some Starfield for good measure. Enjoy!

00:00 – 20:22 Workshopping Justin’s stand-up act

20:32 – 1:20:21 STAGE SELECT: Video game characters we love to hate

1:20:32 – 4:01:53 CONSUMPTION JUNCTION: Julian’s Baldur’s Gate 3 woes, Sea of Stars, Starfield

4:02:30 – 4:17:39 VIDEO GAME CAGE MATCH: James Pond 3: Operation Starfish vs Jerry Rice and Nitus’ Dog Football

4:17:39 – 4:27:02 Outro and outtakes

NEXT WEEK: HEADLINES! (send us emails!)


STAGE SELECT: What are some of your video game “mind goblins”, AKA your weird compulsions with games?

VIDEO GAME CAGE MATCH: Neverwinter Nights vs Beatdown: Fists of Vengeance


Twitter: @NWPcast


Our theme song “Relax” and interstitial tracks “To the Maxx” and “Moody Grooves” are written and performed by Megan McDuffee.




Super Step Contributing Writer

09/14/2023 at 02:47 AM


I will not spend one red cent/yen/rupee/euro/peso/virtual Dave & Buster's coupon or whatever form of in-game currency on anything except HP, MP, and items the game tells me I *have* to buy in order to advance. If there's a way to get any of those things that takes five hours, my real life sanity and joy, and the chance at a fulfilling life yet costs no money, that's what I'm doing ... unless there's a substory dedicated to my character buying their likeness as a billion-yen gold statue, in which case buying that IS the game now. 

Speaking of substories, I have to complete every single one as it becomes available but I will 100% quit a game, even if I'm digging the main story, when too many substories are avilable at once. This goes triple if there are side quests I have to complete to stay properly leveled that have very little story and lots of repetitive bullshit. 

This is similar to my penchant for taking way too much time trying to find every special/secret item in a game on the first playthrough, then immediately giving up and possibly quitting the game the second I miss one I can't easily go back and grab. 

Likewise, if a "puzzle" in the main game consists of finding something on a map without clear directions or hints, I fucking hate that "puzzle," and we find ourselves in game quittin' territory once again if it takes more than ten minutes to find whatever it is. 

TL;DR version: I am a completionist who will fold at the first sign something will be too difficult to complete ... unless it saves me video game money. 


Look, you put the title Beatdown: Fists of Vengeance next to anything else, I'm gonna root for Beatdown: Fists of Vengeance. Put Beatdown: Fists of Vengeance next to my only child? I'm hoping Beatdown: Fists of Vengeance gets a W. Does my cat who's become a friend and family member pass away or does Beatdown: Fists of Vengeance get to win a contest? I'm riding with Beatdown: Fists of Vengeance all the way to the Thunder Dome underneath the Slamarama! Will I have to live cold, alone, and hungry on the streets for the rest of my life if Beatdown: Fists of Vengeance gets to say it won the day? 

... Turns out, I'm a selfish narcissist and now that I've thought about consequences for ME, I'll go ahead and vote Neverwinter Nights


09/22/2023 at 08:06 AM

STAGE SELECT: I'm also one of those people that destroys every barrel, hacks every computer, steals every item, uses a window instead of a door, and absolutely never uses a potion, you know, just in case I have to later (there is no later).  Here's a couple I didn't see mentioned.  If a game has the possibility of a Goomba stomp, ya gotta try it.  I've also perfected battles in various Castlevania games but have become visibly agitated if I miss a cool dive kick into the orb or whatever the boss drops.

VIDEO GAME CAGE MATCH: Where do you guys come up with some of these games?  It's bizarre.  Just these funny little games no one has ever played and certainly nobody cares about.  And what a silly name, "Neverwinter Nights".  Beat Down: Fists of Vengeance wins!

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