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My future game 1: Some story

On 04/14/2013 at 05:29 AM by jcal94

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Hey everyone. I know there's those of you who don't know me, since I migrated from 1up, and there's those of you who do, since we followed each other back on 1up. This is my first blog here, because I guess I'm finally just feeling motivated to get to it. I'll just give a quick background first. I'm an 18 year old male, freshman at my local community college going into Applied Computer Sciences for an Associate before possibly doing Full Sail University game design courses online. I have a side hobby of writing, which use to be a possible career option, but I don't have the patience or method to write out an entire book. So now, I mostly write out dreams I have that could make viable dreams. The one I want the most, and what these "My Future Game" blogs will be about, will be called Defenders. Back to that in a second. I have a few artist friends, and my girlfriend who is 15 and I met at church, is also an artist, who happens to enjoy drawing in an anime/manga style. She is doing a lot of character designs for me recently. Now, onto the story. I'll give a brief overview of the whole thing, and then copy-paste two little cutscenes I have script written for.

So, in Defenders, it's a somewhat dystopian future world. Due to the high national debt of America, a corporation that quickly rose from nothing to extreme riches, called Kingdom, proposed an offer to the United States government. They would pay off the national debt, but then be in complete control of the country, placing their own people as the entire government. Being America, the politicians naturally said yes. The story takes place about 25 years after the buy-out. All the countries in the world despise Kingdom, but can not do anything, as their is such a large army, and their firepower is too immense to even try to start something. During the 25 years, all cities and towns became much more industrialized, entering a steampunk-like era. Buildings remain as they were before the buy-out, but have been added onto to soar skyward even further. Thus, their is a surreal sense of being in the past while knowing the present and it's terrible living conditions are looming over you. This sense keeps many of the everyday citizens in check.

However, there has slowly been a resistance rising up against The Kingdom, which the United States is now known as, and at the same time, juniors and seniors from high schools and college students have been disappearing without a trace, and any questioning is met with just roadblocks in investigation. The Kingdom uses their propaganda-slewing news stations to say it's this resistance abducting the young adults. They have no name, and are just labeled as The Resistance by The Kingdom. The internet is near useless now, as all websites are controlled by The Kingdom, so there is no word on exactly what The Resistance is, or what it does. Everyone fears them, but at the same time fears questioning The Kingdom.

As it turns out, the Resistance is largely made up of the same age group of people being abducted, and then younger adults in their late 20's and early 30's, and some adults who are nearing 40. The older adults are mostly scientists who have, and some who still do, work for The Kingdom. The ones that do, are trying to make sure nothing too terrible is coming to fruition. They are the main start of The Resistance. Why? Because, while working for The Kingdom, they were forced to do experiments on their own children, who were just toddlers at the time, to turn them into super soldiers who could control the elements when they reached maturity. They started planning on how to save their kids, but couldn't think of anything in time, and they were all infused with different elements. The lab this all happened in was in a city that used to be known as Bloomington, Illinois before The Kingdom took over. 

The scientists eventually came up with a plan, but it required them to all take care of saving their own child, and seeing as the parents of one girl didn't see anything wrong with the experiments on their daughter, they were not aware of anything, and the daughter could not be saved at the time. Each of the kids were shipped off to different orphanages around what had been Central Illinois. As they had no official names by the government, being only experiments, it was easier to fake their deaths and put them into care.Two of the toddlers got along extremely well though, and their parents were close friends, even amongst all the other scientists, and they were shipped to the same orphanage, which was in what had been Bloomington. It was risky, but they thought it would be ok. Their names were Ray (the main protaganist) and Leon.

Leon disappeared about 6 months before the game starts, and the cause given to the orphanage was a hit and run accident while he was crossing the street. The truth was he was saved from abduction by The Kingdom to be mentally enslaved as a weapon by The Resistance, which is where about half of the abductions ended up. Leon was then told about the experiments, was told that he was able to control water in all forms (such as in the air, puddles, in his own body, etc), and was taught by some of the other teens that had been the experiments too. The group of just the "elementals" is known as the Defenders, and are the main driving force in attacking The Kingdom. Now, here is the opening scene of Defenders, with Ray (who controls fire, and eventually Darkness and Death), and introducing Sophie, the girl who couldn't be saved, but was around the age of 5 or 6 by Ray's parents, and who can control Light, and eventually Life.

Ray gaining his powers and meeting Sophie:
School lets out. Opening credits as Ray walks downtown. Part tutorial/intro to world.
Ray (to himself): School’s only been going on for two months now, and I’m already sick and tired of it… I need some excitement in my life! *kicks stone, hits metallic surface. Camera pans up to a large building, very industrial-like, with a giant monitor showing a news report*
Reporter: Today there has been another discovery of deceased Kingdom soldiers in the Twin City area. Kingdom representatives are attributing it the rebel forces known as Defenders. Due to the increased number of attacks, only known of through discoveries of bodies, Patriots will be brought in to the Twin City area within the coming week for investigation. For images of the devastation, deemed too graphic for widespread viewing, visit your nearest Kingdom Hall and get permission to use the inter-Kingdom archives with the proper clearance.
Ray (to himself once more, while walking to alley next to aforementioned building and fire escape): Gees, they must really want these rebels if they’re bringing in Patriots… Life is either always mundane or too exciting to want to be involved, never a good balance… *Ray stops, and with a grunt, jumps up to the bottom of the ladder on the fire escape and climbs up to the top. As he’s climbing, camera slowly zooms out to reveal more of the city. Appears extremely industrialized and dystopian. On the roof, walks over to the edge overlooking the street, climbs up on the side, stands tall and stares out at the city for a few seconds, then sits down on the side, legs hanging over the edge. A few more seconds pass, then all of a sudden a pair of bare legs with just athletic shoes and a skirt ending midthigh appear gingerly, hanging over the edge right next to Ray’s, without him even noticing.*
Mystery Girl: Hey there Ray. You come here often…
Ray: *jumps in place slightly* Hey, where did you come from! There wasn’t anyone around when I got off the fire escape…
Mystery Girl: Does it really matter where I came from? I’ve been wanting to meet you, and now I finally was allowed to. Name’s Sophie. Isn’t it rude not to ask a girl her name when you first meet? I would think your parents would have taught you better.
Ray: You’ve been wanting to meet me? And don’t talk to me about manners… You almost scared me off this ledge. As for manners, I don’t have much of anyone to teach me them… One morning when I was a toddler, my parents and the family next door with my best friend Leo, just left me and Leo without us knowing. Next thing we knew we're in the care of the Kingdom, and they throw us in a boarding home. and we were placed in the orphanage. Or that's what we were told. And now he's gone…
Sophie: *wraps left arm around Ray’s right, puts right hand on his right shoulder* Is that why you come up here after school every day and contemplate jumping to end it all? Because of not having parents? Losing your closest friend you’ve ever had? Being controlled by the Kingdom? Or is it because that would finally give you the… *moves her mouth to Ray’s ear* excitement *moves back to regular position* you’ve been longing for in your life? If it’s excitement you want, I can give it to you Ray… I mean, you’ve let me hang on to you this whole time…
Ray: *turns his head to look at her, locking eyes, he sees she has a sly grin on her face* How the hell do you know all that about me?! And even if it weren’t true, you just don’t blurt it out to someone!… I… I don’t want excitement if it means risking myself… That’s just a stupid way to get a thrill… And I didn’t push you away because at first I thought you were just another cute girl, and with how tight you were holding, I didn’t know how to get you off without either of us falling…
Sophie: *giggles* You still haven’t told me if you want to see the excitement I can give you… You may just like it…
Ray: Why, after all the things you’ve said to me, would I want anything to do with you?
Sophie: Because Ray Callaghan… The excitement I’ll show you… You’ll re-encounter past loved ones, past friends, see more of the world than this ugly town, get to know who you really are… And get closer to me *giggles*
Ray: You’re completely creeping me out now. Let go of me and let me just leave. I don’t want to see you again. I won’t be so peaceful next time…
Sophie: That’s a shame Ray… I want to see more of you… But sadly, this isn’t really much of a choice for you now. Your fate has always been tied into joining us at some point. You and me, we’ll be seeing a lot of each other. *Unhooks her left arm, puts it on Ray’s lower back, and starts slowly moving it up*
Ray: You’re a creep. Just let me get away from here already…
Sophie: *hand stops between Ray’s shoulder blades* Ray, you know… You’ll thank me for all this eventually. *shows a cute, innocent smile to him* Keep an eye out on your way down, it is twenty stories after all, and some of this may become clear… See you when you’re reborn!
*With that, Sophie pushes Ray with her left hand, sending him falling down over the edge. As he’s falling, he sees a picture of Sophie, with that exact same grin she just had, on the monitor from before.*
And hearing that, Ray hit’s the ground, and everything goes black. Defenders logo and title fade in, and fade back out.

And lastly, a romance scene about halfway through the game between Ray and Sophie, when they're on better terms. I do apologize for any things that don't match up with my opening overview, and for any errors in the blog. It's getting late and I'm running on fumes. Well, here's the next part:


Ray and Sophie outside at Callaghan Base
Camera starts out pointing up at a starry night sky, flips around slowly to point at lush green grass with Ray and Sophie laying by each other on a blanket, zooms down onto them.
Sophie: Aw, it’s so nice to finally just relax and spend some time with you without worrying about anything. Isn’t it, Ray?
Ray: Yeah, it’s nice and all, just… It feels almost unnatural just sitting around with everything so peaceful… We’ve been fighting for our lives almost constantly since we first met, and suddenly out of the blue, my parents, who had been dead to my knowledge up to this point, find a way to contact us and say they have a house in the SAME town they abandoned me in, and that underneath it there’s enough room for the entire resistance? It just all seems too… perfect for me to accept it so easily…
Sophie: *rolls onto her side to look at Ray* But Ray sweetie
Ray: Sophie, please, I told you I just can’t think of us like that right now, there’s too much going on for me to have to worry about you in another way too…
Sophie: *pouting face displayed* Fine, whatever. But Ray, your parents gave you up for your own good. You know how Leon has had to fight to survive ever since he "disappeared" They wanted you to have a childhood, even if it wasn’t the best. That’s more than any of us Controllers have gotten. Heck, some of our parents were keeping us FOR the Kingdom to do experiments on when we got older, but luckily… luckily your parents, along with Leon’s, started up our resistance, however meager it was then, and saved some of us from the Kingdom and our parents… Like me…
Ray: *sits up fast and looks down at Sophie* Wait, you mean your parents are still working for the Kingdom?! And how did they rescue you?
Sophie sits up and snuggles up against Ray, Ray putting his left arm around her              Sophie: I don’t remember it well… I was starting to get drugged because I was about to have an experiment done on me… I was 6, 6 Ray! And they were going to use me as a guinea pig, my own parents! I was on the table, and I think they may have started something, but suddenly the door bursts open and a flood of light burst through. In come your parents, yelling at mine like they knew them, and some guys pointed guns at my parents while one of your parents undid all the straps holding me down… I can’t remember who though. They brought me here, to help me get over it and to start to embrace my light some. All the rest of the Resistance went back to our old base. It was nice for a while. I finally felt like I was in a normal family, just… with someone missing…                                                                                                                                  Ray: Must be nice, having more attention payed to you by them then they had given their own son…

Sophie: *looks up into Ray’s face* Ray, the person missing, was you. Your pictures were all over the place. That’s when I first knew about who you were. Your parents saw me staring at a picture of you, and they came over and told me about you, how you were like me, just kind of an opposite, and how they gave you up to protect you. They told me how someday, you’d be coming back to help us right the wrongs every terrible person has made, and that I could even be the one to bring you back… I was looking at your picture because I thought you were cute, and was wondering why I had never seen you even though you were all around the house in pictures. So hearing how you were like me, and that I could be the one to bring you back… I had been afraid to go out with your parents and help save other kids, but after all that, I wanted to, because I wanted to make sure I was there when you were brought back, and hopefully that I would be the one to do it. Really though, it ended up as you bringing me back *giggles*. I kind of owe your whole family now. *Sophie smiles big*
Ray: Sophie… I never knew any of that… I’m so sorry for being a selfish jerk there… But if I wasn’t big on fighting for the Defenders before, know that I am now. It’s just wrong that parents would use their own 6 year old daughter as an experiment, and let alone to have it happen to you… I’m going to take down the Kingdom just for that. I’ll make that promise to you now. No matter who gets in my way, even if it ends up being one of my closest friends, I’ll make sure the Kingdom is dismantled.
Sophie: *moves her head closer to Ray’s* Really Ray? That’s a lot to promise… but if you’re serious, maybe you could… seal it with a kiss?
Ray: Fine, I guess I can this time, after everything you told me. I do kind of owe you one still. *laughs*
Ray goes in for a small kiss on the lips with Sophie. Pulling back, want can be seen in each of their eyes. They go back in to kiss more passionately. Ray pulls Sophie close to him and holds her tight. She lays back down and they continue kissing. Ray starts moving down to kiss the curve of her neck, and then the screen fades to black. Next scene starts with Leon coming out to wake up Ray and Sophie outside, and Ray without a shirt on. Sophie appears very embarrassed that Leon came out, but is fully clothed.
Leon: Hey guys, wake up!... WOAH! Did I just interrupt something?
Ray: Leon, shut up, what’s going on?
Leon: We just have a meeting is all, but if you can’t be there… I can make an excuse for you two. *winks at Ray*
Sophie: Leon, just go you idiot!
Leon: Geez, fine Miss grumpy. And Ray, very nice. *laughs while walking off*

So there we go. The opening cutscene script, and then the script for one of the most important cutscenes in the entire game. The whole games (Would definitely be 2, hopefully would be a trilogy depending on sales) would have themes dealing with life and death, the human soul, love vs obsession, the field of medicine and changing the human body, and how government interference can be catastrophic. They'd definitely be rated M, and hopefully would have a play style that's a mix of Personas and Kingdom Hearts, but have an art style of Toki Towa, also known as Time and Eternity, so really hopefully the whole game, even during battles and all, would look like an anime. It's meant to be a western-made JRPG, which I know means it would have a big flagstone to live up to for many JRPG fans, but hopefully it could appeal to Western audiences too.

To close, Ben, I did get his up tonight, barely! Haha. And to everyone here, just to make sure being new to the site, what's the policy on writing that would be on the borderline between T and M rating? I just want to double-check so as not to cause any problems, because there's two scenes I hope to type tomorrow where one is definitely borderline, and the other is a definitive M. I'm sorry for how long this blog was, and I'll try to keep them shorter in the future! ????????for sticking through all this!



Matt Snee Staff Writer

04/14/2013 at 07:48 AM

I haven't read through all this yet, but I will.  I'm a big believer in following your creative dreams, so I say go for it, man!  But remember to keep things simple at first, because making things are always more complicated than you initially think.  

As far as M rated content on pixlbit, it's okay just warn people in advance.  X rated content is not really chill though.  


04/14/2013 at 03:13 PM

its understandable you haven't read it all yet, haha. That's fine, I know i went kinda (ok, really) long on this, especially for a first blog! I do have a problem with keeping things simple, at least with this story, because it will end up involving "multiple main characters" (that's one of the things I don't want to reveal ever, as it's a huge plot twist for the first two) and time travel elements. Luckily, I have quite a long time to get it all refined, as I still have at least 4 years of college left, and then will probably have to make small games first in order to get money to use as a budget for this.

And thanks for the clarification on the M-rated thing. Just wanted to make sure! Rest assured, there will be no X-rated stuff, especially since people such as my church family, my family, and my girlfriend can all find this page by googling me, haha! But the games won't ever have any X-rated stuff =)


04/14/2013 at 09:37 AM

This is some real good stuff. If this ever comes out, it's a day one purchase for me. 

Also, You've inspired me. I think I might do a blog like this some day; I have all these ideas floating around in my head and I really got to put them down on paper lol.


04/14/2013 at 03:29 PM

Glad to have inspired you, TK! And thanks for the advance advance purchase, bahaha! Rest assured too, that there are many more twists than I can list here without completely spoiling the game, and those will remain a secret until the game will be released someday! I'm hoping I can get it out before the PS4 life-cycle would end, and although it won't reach as large an audience, I will have it be a Sony exclusive, just because, from research I've done, it is much easier and less frustrating to develop for the Playstation than for the Xbox, and i'm trying to not blow a bunch of money, so won't hire a port team. The studio I hope to start up is meant to be a small one, largely made up of people I know.


04/14/2013 at 10:09 AM

Yes your a very creative writer and i bet you could write some kick butt reveiws but at any rate Im not sure if you have seen any of my blogs etc on 1up since i was a member since 2004 but anyone who is a x 1upper is all good in my book so i will follow you, and glad to have you here.


04/14/2013 at 03:31 PM

Thanks Lee! I have tried reviews once or twice before on 1up, but the only games I feel compelled to review are ones I love, and then I feel like it'd be a REALLY biased review, haha. 


04/14/2013 at 05:18 PM

Hell as good a writer as you are it would be an injustice for you not to lol.Tongue Out


04/14/2013 at 12:24 PM

What's scary is I could imagine something like this happening. Aka, our economy collapsing and someone buying us out right before taking control. You've built up an interesting setting!


04/14/2013 at 03:39 PM

Thanks Ben! This has all been built up from a dream in 7th grade, and the dream itself was grounded in reality a lot, taking place in my town, places I knew intimately, etc. I've pulled bits and pieces from different things over the years, compiling it into what I'd like the story to be. Some time travel and paradox-avoidance from a book called Bunker 10, character growth and the soul from Fullmetal Alchemist, the exploration of regular emotions and their extremes from a book called Dark Angel, and very recently I got the buyout thing from a mixture of our economy and hearing about the manga Dance in the Vampire Bund, where a vampire princess is given a Japanese island since she used her family's wealth to pay off Japan's debt. I had been struggling for a while on how to have The Kingdom rise to power, and this seemed like the most reasonable way.

And Ben, whenever I get my studio up off the ground, even when it's just a few people, you have an open invitation to join it! I've seen your writing and artistry, and would be more than happy to have you assist! And I think you'd enjoy Central Illinois, haha!

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