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Nerds Without Pants   

Nerds Without Pants Episode 93: Classic Game Consumption

We had so much to talk about that we needed a bonus episode!

Welcome to a surprise edition of Nerds Without Pants! After our nearly three-hour kickoff for our new Stage Select feature, we decided to get together for a good old fashioned “all Consumption Junction” episode. Strap in for a couple hours of media consumption!

Patrick had a magical moment at Lollapalooza. Angelo went hard into Doom 2016 (we promise this is the last time we talk about it in depth!). Julian is lukewarm on We Happy Few, but can’t stop his masochistic relationship with Divinity: Original Sin. Angelo has some complicated board games to talk about, and Patrick might be done with Pokemon Go. We finish things out with some talk about Batman: The Killing Joke, and Julian’s first time at a classic games show. We hope you enjoy this impromptu episode!

Next week, we’re discussing our top 3 video game weapons during Stage Select, and in Chrono Crossing we’re looking back at 2009. If you haven’t contributed to those segments you still have a couple days before we record.


Schoolhouse Rock- Conjunction Junction

Jane’s Addiction- Jane Says

Divinity: Original Sin- Dance of Death

Ninja Sex Party- Next to You

Final Fantasy- Matoya’s Cave




08/07/2016 at 08:30 PM

Stage Select

3. .510 Bolt Action Sniper in the original Cabela's Dangerous Hunts 2003 - The game has big sandbox levels with varied elevation, bullet drop, and bullet cam. The power of the .510 allows me to shoot all the way across the map, and I can watch the bullet curve over hills and mountains and kill an animal several hundred meters away in one shot

2. Big Boss' hands in Metal Gear Solid 3 - All the different CQC mechanics are highly satisfying and useful when you're in a pinch and need to non-lethaly take down guys with guns. The CQC and jungle setting make me feel like Jason Statham in a Vietnam movie

1. Mario's Butt - to this day, vanquishing enemies in any game has never been as satisfying as bopping goombas on the head

Chrono Crossing 2009

Assassin's Creed 2 - Mechanically and storywise AC2 isn't the best game that came out in 2009 but it's by far the one game that dominates my memories of that year. I loved the Italy setting, the architecture, historical codex info, and the culture. I personally think AC2 is the closest that the series has ever come to realizing its potential as the time traveling historical simulator it could be.


08/08/2016 at 12:41 AM

My 2009 pick is Wolfenstein. My friend Mark and I played this in tandem. I just heard the same mellon exploding sound effect used in Wolfenstein in Gears of War Ultimate when you get a headshot with the Boltok Pistol. It's hilarious. Makes me laugh every time. Sick isn't it. 


08/08/2016 at 08:10 AM

Stage Select:  Buster Sword from FF VII.  Dubstep Gun from Saints Row IV.  Sheepinator from Ratchet and Clank.

I looked up Chrono Trigger on How Long to Beat and it said 25 hours.  I had it finished in 18.  I was so happy when that happened....  in regards to game lengths.

Julian Titus Senior Editor

08/08/2016 at 10:30 AM

I'll have to pop my cart in and see if my save file is still there, but I feel like I took way longer to finish Chrono Trigger. But that was also in the days when I would hit max level in RPGs.

Jamie Alston Staff Writer

08/08/2016 at 10:51 AM

I also need to check the time stamp of final save in CT. I definitely remember going in circles a few times because I didn't quite know where to go next. But I didn't mind because I enjoyed that beautiful music!


08/08/2016 at 11:04 AM

I could have sworn that my very first run was 40+ hours, so I was more than a little surprised.  Also, I have played the first half of that game so many times that I know it by heart and did not waste anytime whatsoever until I had to go back and get Ayla.

Julian Titus Senior Editor

08/09/2016 at 11:43 AM

Looks like my original save clocked in right at 30 hours. Funny how you remember these older games as being really long, but that is a perfect length for an RPG to me these days. 


08/10/2016 at 01:20 PM

I totally agree.  I can't believe that it had taken such a long time to realize that length does not indicate quality...  when it comes to games.

I just looked up FF VII on How Long to Beat and it says 39 hours for the main storyline.  I wonder if that is why I haven't touched the PS4 release of that game.

Exrian Contributing Writer

08/08/2016 at 10:50 PM

Glad you're enjoying Divinity Julian. I jumped into it a few months back and got about 40 hours in before I stopped. It was a great game but I got my next big game and don't see myself going back. 

Chrono Crossing 2009

Demon's Souls: Not my favorite Souls game but my first. If I caught this in my teen years I'm pretty sure I'd have a few broken controllers. 


Stage Select  

3. Genocide Gun (Earth Defense Force 2017): Complete annihilation. This gun would make many shooters a cake walk if it didn't destroy the player in the process.

2. Bayonetta's Hair  (Bayonetta): Very versatile and unique weapon. Well unique in how crazily it shape shifted. 

1. Ivy's Whip Sword (Soul Calibur Series): Definitely not the strongest weapon on my list but it's so bad@**.


Julian Titus Senior Editor

08/09/2016 at 12:23 AM

I was up until 2:30 last night because I cleared out three of the big bosses around Cyseal and was on a roll. I'm paying for it now. Thanks for the input! We got your selections in the show (we just finished recording).

Exrian Contributing Writer

08/10/2016 at 03:43 PM

Yeah I'm on a similar run. First time I've had some days off in a few weeks so I've been pulling all nighters on Doom and Overwatch. 

Really happy to be a part of these new segments. It's so cool to see NWP hosts posting about games on a normal level around here. I listen to 12 podcasts regularly and you guys just seen like normal gamers like us. Im happy to say that you guys have quickly moved into my regular podcast list. So I'll be around for the long haul. 

Julian Titus Senior Editor

08/13/2016 at 04:32 PM

Thanks! It has always been my goal with Nerds Without Pants to make it somewhat timeless. Since we don't really cover news (other than our E3 specials) and we're not only playing the bleeding edge releases the show kind of stands on its own, and I tried to make our topics in the old format into something that you can enjoy just as much a couple years later. I've had some people go back and start from the beginning, and besides the noticeable drop in audio and editing quality, they hold up pretty well.

I love the interaction with listeners, and I'm hoping for more of it, as well as hoping to grow the show even more. Let me know what you think of episode 94, I'm quite proud of it!

Our Take

Jesse Miller Staff Writer

08/11/2016 at 11:48 AM

Stage Select:

3) The Metal Blade (Mega Man 2) - The most satisfying and utilitarian weapon in the entire game, and likely the oldest weapon I can remember specifically using. 

2) Soul Reaver (Legacy of Kain: Soul Reaver) - This sword has been around for quite a few games, but it's role in the Soul Reaver series is what puts it up there for me. Coolest sword in video games (even over the ever popular Buster Sword) by far.

1) The BFG (Doom - original) - How could this not be on here? This is the grandaddy of all video game weapons and has the absolute best name (which it absolutely lives up to). Has to be number one.

Honorable Mention: All the guns in Ratchet and Clank. Shooting stuff is just so much fun in those games.

Angelo Grant Staff Writer

08/22/2016 at 02:06 PM

Pretty sure I remember reading elaborate descriptions of every weapon in Doom somewhere, either in game or in some other medium. The only one that didn't have a crazy description was the BFG. It only had a single line:

"It clears out a room for you"

And it does...

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