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Zombii Attack Review


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On 01/15/2012 at 11:00 PM by Nick DiMola

The N64 was two, almost three generations ago, right?
RECOMMENDATION:

Not Recommended.

I would call myself a gaming enthusiast – someone who can appreciate just about any type of game for its unique merits. As such, I rarely see any game as a complete and total waste; Zombii Attack is one of those rare exceptions. Surely, it'd be better off buried somewhere out in the desert next to the Atari version of E.T..

The rough visuals and disjointed menus made it apparent from the get-go that Zombii Attack was a low production title. After jumping into the game (which seemingly stole its visuals from N64 shovelware), I learned that the world had been conquered by hordes of zombies. In order to defend myself and attempt to find the magic formula needed to cure the virus, I had to take control of a giant slingshot.

Using this slingshot, I needed to hurl rocks and other items at the zombies to kill them. In order to produce the formula, your sidekick professor has given you a list of specific colored zombies. To collect these zombies, you must grab them with your tractor beam (standard issue with huge slingshot equipment) and send them hurling through the air into a net hanging off of a helicopter that is needlessly moving around the level. You’ll need to keep the other zombies heading your direction off your barricade as they will seek to destroy it and snack on your delicious brains.

Outside of missions where you have to throw explosives at the background buildings to destroy them, each and every mission plays out the exact same way. Oh, except for those that randomly toss you into a car after you’ve made the formula; forcing you to drive along the blandest looking straight road, running over zombies and avoiding cars.

Though the game provides you with a huge arsenal of weaponry that you progressively unlock, it’s always easier to use the slingshot and hurl zombies into each other in order to defeat them. Merely picking up a zombie with the slingshot guarantees their death, so it rarely makes sense to use the ammo, except when you’re in a pinch.

By far my favorite part of the game was the looping background track which was only about 5-10 seconds long. It was short, bu… I can’t do this. The music is awful and I wanted to smash my speakers after hearing the same thing for 10 minutes straight.

I’m not really sure there’s anything else worth saying about Zombii Attack. It’s completely mindless, boring, and it has no redeeming features. Barely matching up to the quality of a Flash game, there’s little question that Zombii Attack isn’t worth your time or money.

Review Policy

In our reviews, we'll try not to bore you with minutiae of a game. Instead, we'll outline what makes the game good or bad, and focus on telling you whether or not it is worth your time as opposed to what button makes you jump.

We use a five-star rating system with intervals of .5. Below is an outline of what each score generally means:


All games that receive this score are standout games in their genre. All players should seek a way to play this game. While the score doesn't equate to perfection, it's the best any game could conceivably do.


These are above-average games that most players should consider purchasing. Nearly everyone will enjoy the game and given the proper audience, some may even love these games.


This is our middle-of-the-road ranking. Titles that receive three stars may not make a strong impression on the reviewer in either direction. These games may have some faults and some strong points but they average out to be a modest title that is at least worthy of rental for most.


Games that are awarded two stars are below average titles. Good ideas may be present, but execution is poor and many issues hinder the experience.


Though functional, a game that receives this score has major issues. There are little to no redeeming qualities and should be avoided by nearly all players.


A game that gets this score is fundamentally broken and should be avoided by everyone.


 

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