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Dear gamer activists
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 On 11/13/2013 at 05:12 PM by BrokenH See More From This User » |
Stop bothering me you little rankle-stanks!
I’ve been gaming since I was 13 and being I’m 35 now I think that gives me some credence. (Despite the fact senility is setting in quickly!) Anyway, the last time I did one of these “Dear gamer” letters it pissed off some folks. But being I never gave a shit about impressing certain people or fitting in I commenced with this follow-up! (Don't ask me why I've been so ornery and angry lately. It'll eventually run its' course and we can all reminisce in the near future about what an asshole I was!)
Dear gamer activists
By now I’m an older lonely man in my mid 30‘s. I’m simply indulging in the things that make me happy and have no desire to cause harm to anyone else. The problem is that’s not enough for you ,is it?
Pardon me if I don’t rise up my picket sign when you snidely reply how Juliet Starling looks like a strumpet in Lollipop chainsaw. Jessica Nigri proudly cosplayed as her and I don’t see how going after a fictional female protagonist is relevant. Tell me, has a cross been burnt in your yard? Have you been stoned for not covering up properly? Have you been ridiculed merely for wanting to sit down on a specific seat in the bus? I imagine you have not. You may have gotten harassed on the internet but so has everyone else! There are much fewer "truly vile villains” to fight so you make up your new “bad guys” out of the liberal thinkers who are not “left“ enough!
I really don’t understand you young people making a huff about “fan service”. It’s as if none of you have seen Samus in her zero suit, played as Cammy in any street fighter game, or know what a “succubus” really is. You are pushing for more “realistic characters” when the truth is no one wants to be a lanky muscle deprived long haired loser such as myself or a grotesquely heavy set woman. I know that hurts to hear but it’s the truth! Do any of you make “ugly looking or average looking avatars” when you play an MMORPG or Saints Row 3? Be honest with yourselves. You may create an unattractive or plain character for shits & giggles but I’ll bet any amount of money you have your idealistic Adonis or idealistic goddess avatar standing beside his or her less flattering counterpart. Why? Because videogames are escapism and we rarely want to be ourselves in a virtual world!
This is not to say I do not want well written characters. It’s not to say there cannot be an endearing protagonist who is also gay, trans, skinny, fat,short,bald, purple, green, wheelchair bound, or who has a crooked nose! However, sometimes I like cheesy machismo and over the top sexiness! No, it shouldn’t be “the law of the land” but it likewise shouldn’t be phased out completely just so no one gets offended thus fitting within your confines of wussified politically correct bullshit!
Moving on, you guys have been using “BIG WORDS” lately. While I was admittedly impressed at first, I soon learned you have no idea what the fuck you’re talking about. Hideo Kojima is a misogynist (woman-hater) just because his female sniper character has a sexy design? Anyone who disagrees with Anita Sarkeesian must be anti-equality and a “big meanie troll head“? Stop the sensationalizing and over generalization you unprofessional hacks! Creating sexy depictions of women doesn’t make someone a “hater” of that gender. Disagreeing with a supposed “feminist”(much less one who admits to not being a gamer despite doing a whole documentary on gaming) does not make someone anti-equality.
Get your facts straight or don’t bother putting them up at all! These types of issues have shades of gray so stop using your ineffective Occam’s razor in a failed attempt to make every position seem entirely right or entirely wrong! Reality rarely dolls out statistics in absolutes!
In a rational world “I” would be the old man with a stick up my ass. “I” would be telling you kids to turn down your music and dress more conservatively. Yet here I am blaring my “offensive” heavy metal music and playing my “offensive” videogames as you all try to preach to me as if you’re a bunch of puritan pilgrims just now getting off the May-flower! My point? You’re still young. Give a middle finger to authority, indulge in wild sex, and “LIVE” for crying out loud! You’re too fucking YOUNG to be so fucking OLD! Don’t let dick-less/vagina-less activist hacks in it only for the site traffic and site hits dictate how YOU should behave! Do you want to be just another brick in the wall? 
Lemmy says it best!
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